Quote of the Day

While you are destroying your mind watching the worthless, brain-rotting drivel on TV, we on the Internet are exchanging, freely and openly, the most uninhibited, intimate and, yes, shocking details about our config.sys settings. ~Dave Barry

Nov 24, 2011

Happy Thanksgiving, Interwebz!

Oh, HAI Interwebz! heh I guess I didn't see you there. I've been meaning to call, you know. I've just been so busy. You know me! Busy, busy, busy! Sorry 'bout that! haha I mean, I've only casually been seeing this other blog and it's not like it means anything. It's just better for me. My only true love is you, of course. heh

So anyway, how are you Interwebz? I want to hear alllllll about you. I have a turkey sitting in the oven getting all cooked without any intervention from me, so I have approximately four more hours to hear about you.

Oh, who am I kidding? Blogging = self-centered chit-chat about me, right?

I have been very busy working and also I hate school now. I wanted to quit, but instead I'm just trying to get done super fast so I don't have to go anymore. My new need to spend all spare time on homework has brought out the crazy in my kids. For every hour I spend working on that, they spend two either making messes or learning new words they aren't allowed to say.

At church on Sunday, Donovan was being a terror as usual. He was making noise and running through the pews and banging the kneelers and hitting his siblings. I took him outside and had a Big Talk with him about being good. He promised me he would. We sat back down and he climbed behind me in the pew while I was kneeling down. It occurred to him that I may need a child to hang from my back, so he made a flying leap onto me and used my sweater to hold on. Only my sweater was designed more for a quiet day at the office rather than flying monkey children, which didn't occur to Donovan until he slid all the way down to my feet, taking my sweater with him.

We come from a fairly traditional parish, and people losing clothes halfway through mass is frowned upon to say the least. I was glaring at him, trying to telepathically convince him that he was in HUGE amounts of trouble as soon as I could put my clothes back together. He crawled into my lap, put his arms around my neck, looked deep into my eyes with this innocent little expression on his face, and ever so sweetly whispered the one word he knew would get a reaction out of me: "Butthole"

Nov 2, 2011

Five Minutes

Hi, Interwebz!

It's been awhile, but that's because the new Interwebz I work for pays me to write stuff, and you guys, sadly, do not. But this Interwebz is nicer than the other because I don't have to be all worried about "facts" and "spelling" and "where to put quotation marks." In short, I missed you guys.

Yesterday, I had a meeting at work, class and an interview I decided to skip (for the real-people job), and six parent-teacher conferences. I nearly DIIIIIED, yo. But it was still better than last week when I choked on a cough drop in front of an entire office full of new coworkers.

The kids' dad is going to have surgery in a couple of weeks to remove tumors from the pituitary gland. I was trying to explain this to the kids, and hoping they wouldn't freak out. They asked me where the pituitary gland is, and I hesitantly told them it was in the brain. I explained that they would do the surgery through the nose, I thought it might make it easier for the kids to accept.

I held my breath at the silence that filled the car while they processed this new bit of information. Warrick grasped it first, "So...they go in his nose, and pull out tumors?" "Yes," I said, "but you don't have to worry..." He interrupted, "So the doctor is gonna be like 'Man, why don't you try blowing your nose every once in awhile? You'd save everyone a lot of trouble!'"

As the car erupted into giggles, I quit worrying about my kids. They got this. They are very hopeful that their dad is going to be better when this is done, but they are realistic in their expectations. More importantly, they can still find the humor in anything. If there was one lesson I wanted them to take over the last two years, it was this. There is always fun, there is always laughter, and we are always blessed -- we just have to give those things the attention they deserve.