Why Blogger?

Well, I was starting this blog, planning to write daily. The point of this was mostly to amuse myself, because I actually find myself quite funny (lucky for me but not so for anyone who gets stuck listening to me). My plan had been to write something every evening, so that I could go back later and remember how funny things really are. And usually, that works out great, because they are always funny when I read about them long after I am done freaking out. But, the best laid plans...

I had a baby six weeks ago. Before that, I also had the privilege of having five other babies (not all at once, but really close). This is my only accomplishment in the last six years. I have done nothing at all except have babies. I can't really say I have done anything else that has stayed done. The best part about having babies is that you can't un-have them. The dishes can get dirty, the laundry gets undone, the dinners get eaten, the bills keep piling up...but babies stay had. Anyway, I had my baby, and he was ripped from my arms three hours later. Actually, he wasn't ripped, because the nurses were really nice about it, but that is what it felt like. He was whisked away to a different hospital to have an emergency surgery. My plan had been to spend that night ooh-ing and ahh-ing over him, and then do that for about two days, and then go home and do that some more. Well, that didn't happen. Instead, I spent that night wailing until my mommy came up and made me sleep. As soon as I woke up, I left my hospital and went to his. The sleep my mom made me get was the last I was to get for a long time. It turned out that the baby didn't need the surgery right away (he will have it in about two weeks), but he remained in the NICU for two days for testing.

I didn't rest during those days -- I mostly sat in his room, being startled awake by nurses every time my eyes dared to close. (I was allowed complete access to the chair in his room any time of the day or night, as long as I didn't fall asleep -- I have no idea why.) I planned to have my wonderful husband take the kids for a day after we got back so I could have my baby time, and also to have him take the baby one night so that I could get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. Well...

That didn't happen. After the baby was born, my husband felt bad about the time he had missed from work (he was with the baby non-stop, as well), so he spent the next few days at the office. Then he was hospitalized. For two and half weeks. I spent those two weeks carting my kids to sitters, going to see my dearest, and just trying to hold everything together. My fabulous sisters, sister-in-law and mother kept me sane, and watched my babies for me. My mother-in-law and I teamed up to help my husband. I planned to get over this hospital stay and take one day to clean my house and put my life back together and keep it that way so I could enjoy my babies until school started. Well...

The night he got home from the hospital, he got a stomach ache. After three days of him bending over in pain, I finally insisted that he go the (guess where?) hospital. I believe he would have preferred that I go jump in a lake than sit there and nag him about going back to a hospital. I called in the troops (his mother). It turns out that he had appendicitis. One emergency surgery later (his appendix did burst, meanwhile, of course), he is in the hospital for another three days. This poor guy. So at this point, I start feeling sorry for him instead of me. I mean, I had missed out on a lot of lovin' on my babies, and I had missed my husband desperately, but he had all of those same problems, as well as all the pain and being cooped up. I planned on bringing him home and taking care of him and my babies and doing nothing else for pretty much ever.

But, lo and behold, life goes on even if I am not there to control everything. My adorable and brave grandparents managed to have a fiftieth anniversary last week. Congratulations to them! My mom and my aunts are throwing them a much deserved party. (I think the party is deserved by EVERYONE at this point.) So, the two nights after the hospital, I leave my husband at home and take my kids to help get things ready (I was not much help), and tomorrow, I will attend the party and probably leave him here again. So, at this point, I have figured something out.

See, God made me a big sister of six. I was born to be bossy and in control of everything. I am really good at it, I think. I am sure that everyone would be much happier if they did everything my way. This does not apply only to my younger siblings, but pretty much everyone in the whole world. Well, I am thinking that, with all of this planning I have been trying to do, God has been trying to tell me something. I can't imagine that it would possibly be that the Almighty is better than I at controlling the world, could it??? I wondered this on my way home this evening. Maybe it's something else...like maybe He wants me to take on bigger and better things...perhaps controlling the United States or something? Who knows? Because I can't possibly imagine how anything would manage to get done if I hadn't planned it!

But my sweet Jamesy Wamesy (wassup, cuz') taught me something tonight. He thought of an idea for us grandkids to do at the party tomorrow. It was a good idea. Like really good. And you know what? I didn't have anything to do with it! He thought it up all by him little selfy-welfy. Can you believe that? I couldn't. I mean, he's smart and everything, but seriously, can other people really honestly be as good as I am at knowing how everything should be????? What?!?!?! Well, apparently so. So, the Lord used James to show me something that the last six weeks of hospital visits hadn't managed to drum into my brain -- I DON'T HAVE TO BE IN CHARGE. I am actually NOT in charge, and I never was!!! (Are you all ready for this, because it may come as a shock to you that I am not who you thought I was?!?!) GOD is in charge!!! Thank Goodness for that, too, because my plans have the tendency to fall apart with a serious quickness. So, now that you have all been shocked with the news of Who is really the Boss, I will start trying to take a back seat from now on. If any of you do notice me trying to take the wheel again, please put me back into the back and strap me into the seat. I am sure that won't work, so keep the trunk unlocked just in case.