So...
10. Catholics aren't allowed to get married outside of the country of their birth. It has something to do with the whole..uh...churchy...um...yeah. You'll be grounded.
9. When you're on an airplane, chew gum. When you're on a bus, get off of it and call a cab.
8. When one is traveling, one would do well to bring one's eldest sister goodies from distant lands.
7. If you meet people who say, "Oh, I know someone from the US..." and expects you to know who they are talking about, do not be offended unless their friend is a Yankee.
6. Don't talk politics. Someone back home is bound to hear about it and get totally upset about it. Look what happened to the Dixie Chicks...you may have to wait till they're on "Where are They Now?" to find out.
5. If you come home and start pronouncing common foreign words and places in their original accent rather than the accent you were rightfully raised with, you have to put a dollar in the d-bag jar. (I'm sorry, there is no polite replacement for that word.)
4. Go to church.
3. Keep in touch with your family.
2. If you suddenly find yourself naked, running down the road with screaming people chasing you, DO NOT WORRY. You are not coming out of a blackout. You have merely been transported 18 years in the past. You parents are gone, and your sisters are trying to keep an eye on you.
1. Do not, under any circumstances, do that again. I will not look for you this time.
If you want to keep up with my brother's journey, you can do so here.
