I'd like to take a moment to fix the problems in today's world. You may either read this and pass it along until everyone reads and follows them, or elect me president. Either way is fine with me, however, if I were president, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have to do laundry anymore, so that may be the best solution...
1. Bring back manners.
2. Never vote in favor of death, bigger government or higher income taxes.
3. We could cut taxes tremendously if we quit paying the politicians. If they were volunteers, maybe we would start getting people who actually care about the betterment of our country.
4. Anyone who drinks and drives should have something cut off of their person. Maybe their right foot.
5. Anyone who hurts children should have something cut off of their person. No need to give a suggestion as to which part.
6. Stop suing doctors. Money isn't going to fix it, and all you do is raise the cost of healthcare.
7. Men should be men, and teach their sons to be men. Quit being gigantic wusses.
8. Women should be women, and teach their daughters to be women. Quit letting the men be wusses.
9. School should start at ten and give me a chance to drink some coffee before I have to drive near a high concentration of children.
10. Raise your children. Don't let everyone else do it, because they're doing a horrible job.
11. Americans should use only British swear words. They are funnier.
This is part one. I have things to do. Bergershnerger.
