When people hear my story, they tend to wonder if I'm lying. At least, I assume they do, because I would think that if I wasn't the one living it. I have been asked so many times how I handle everything, and I feel the need to clear this up. I don't handle anything.
Mostly, I just drive.
When things go terribly wrong, and I need some time to take care of it, my sisters and my parents are the ones who pick up the slack, not me. They watch my kids, listen to me complain, send over food, run errands and generally take over my real life so that I can focus on the disaster. And I'll tell you a secret, Interwebz, many times, the disaster is easier than my day-to-day life, so they're doing the dirty work while I get all the glory.
When I'm having a bad day, and I need to talk or to laugh, I have a BFF who always knows if I want to talk or just text, if I want coffee or beer, and will also tell me I'm pretty, which, WIN. She also knows when I want to just be left alone.
I have another friend I rarely talk to, who calls me at the just the right times to say just the right things. This has to be very stressful, but this friend has helped me through the darkest times.
I have more friends who live close to me. They do things like watch my kids, bring me things I need, check on me when I'm sick, and show up in my driveway when trouble's brewing.
I have brothers who get late-night phone calls and bring me cigs when I forget to buy them. And I can't tell you how many times they have helped me put my kids to bed, which is the worst thing in the world to do.
My dad loans me money and is always there when I just want to be mad about it all. He helps me think of the best words to use. I know he'll be mad at me for this, but he's also a softie. He's brought me heaters and even (don't tell anyone) babysat a few times.
The people who own Donovan's daycare have helped me find a lawyer, they have sent goodies over for the kids, they have told me to put them on speed dial in case I ever need them (ahem...28 years in the Marine Corps, that's some serious backup), and are even helping me pick out my very own gun. Because I live in the country, now.
My neighbors, who also own my house, have let my kids spend countless hours playing at their house, they take my boys out to do guy stuff, they jump my truck when the kids leave the lights on, and have become very good friends in the short time I've lived here.
Today, as I went through my normal routine, it struck me that these people I see every day, from the couple who owns my favorite gas station, to all of my neighbors, even the people at my school and my kids' school, have become very important to my life. Without them, I wouldn't get through any of this. I would have quit a long time ago. They are the people who keep my life on track. They are the ones who "handle it". I'm just along for the ride.
