It is a leather sparkly-spiked bracelet. It looks like this:
It clearly says that the wearer is amazingly intelligent, not too old for it at all, and totally into being attractive and stylish.
To further that point, I wear it upside down, like this:
Because that's how I roll, yo....put the best parts where nobody can see them and the functional parts up high to show how excessively functional I am...and also how very sparkly I am if only you look under my wrists.
The ring is a bonus...it's actually two rings, because the one just wasn't accomplishing what I wanted, which was to border both sides of yet another ring that says "FAITH", only I lost my faith ring, which is symbolic of absolutely nothing except maybe that I don't always put things were they belong. Anyway, I wear the rings in case I ever need to punch someone really hard in the forehead with my left hand, which happens a lot more often than you might think, but still less often than, say, Christmas. Still, you obviously don't want to make me angry.
Anyway, the point to all of this is that I lost my bracelet (again). I like to drive with the windows down, so I'm guessing the bracelet jumped ship because I hadn't been out of the truck yet.
Did I mention how much this bracelet means to me? As in, I would drive around for miles looking for it in ditches and possibly even attack 12 year old skater chicks because they may have one that looks almost similar, or not really at all similar unless you're driving 45 miles down a dirt road? Because that's exactly what I did for this bracelet today.
His name is Toby the Awesome Bracelet.
And he was lost.
I didn't find him in any ditches, and if there were a 12 year old skater chick who learned a lesson about talking to crazy old lady strangers today, it wasn't on her, either. I spent hours or maybe minutes looking for Toby.
Toby may not love me as much as I love him. Figures.
