Once upon a time, in the land of Walmart #***, in the Village of Pharmacy, there lived a young man named Chad. Chad worked without cease, making sure the people of Pharmacy were efficient and smart and always smiling.
Chad was magic, and he sold concoctions to aid the sick people from all over Walmart, and even other kingdoms.
The visitors to Pharmacy would be greeted with smiles and they would purchase their medicine from Chad and go home after only a few moments to begin getting well.
One day, the evil ruler of Walmart made Chad go work in the Village of Electronics or maybe he was a manager or something, but whatever it was, it meant that he no longer helped Pharmacy.
Pharmacy became a dark and devastating place, where the villagers were rude and hateful to the poor sick people, and would take a long time to get their medicine. Sometimes (many more than one time), it took the people an entire day to get their medicine, because the Pharmacy people would not even bother to find solutions to problems and would tell the sick to come back again and again, until the sick people finally started getting their medicine from the Land of CVS, where smiles abound and they aren’t made to sit there for hours at a time with strep or the flu.
The people wrote a request to the king to please bring Chad back to Pharmacy, or at least give him a raise for whatever it is he does now, because he is the rightful King of Walmart, and his absence has proven that the previous success of Pharmacy was due only to him.
The king ignored the request, because Chad was probably happier in his new job, but perhaps the King of Walmart would consider the following:
If the people have to sign three papers, have them sign them all at once instead of waiting between each one.
If the people have a problem with their insurance, try calling them instead of making the poor sick people drive back every hour for five hours.
Never yell at sick people, it is not their fault they’re sick, and they probably like being there even less than the employees do. As a matter of fact, the entire Village of Pharmacy needs a class in customer service.
If the employee leaves to get a spoon for a sick child’s medicine, it should take less than twenty minutes. If the pharmacist is busy flirting with the techs, perhaps he could make sure his job is done first.
The people were heard by the Kingdom of Walmart’s email service, and lived happily ever after.
The End
